3 more days - exactly one month I didn't update my blog.
I was trying to type something here, but exhausted, deleted the words.
I was trying to type something here, but exhausted, deleted the words.
~My world must full of colour~
02 December 2014
05 November 2014
Faded
Sometimes I might think of you, how many times I have told myself to let it go. But you know, it isn't easy, sometimes like now, the time thinking of you just get myself emotional. Both of us seem started a new chapter of life, after we're getting lesser on contact, yea maybe you've moved on, or just moves on like usual ( its just I didn't understand you, I relied my six sense so much to believe who I thought you are but you actually aren't the one I think you should be ) , and I am still staying at back, looking the back of you.
Everything will be fine, its just time matters, like back to few years ago, and what I believe is, the feeling will faded even faster, because I didn't fall deep.
Everything will be fine, its just time matters, like back to few years ago, and what I believe is, the feeling will faded even faster, because I didn't fall deep.
31 October 2014
enjoy being alone
So far I quite enjoy the moment while I am at home, alone, so quite and peace. I am getting greedy, wanted more time being alone but I cant, my parents will be back soon. I dont know why, I am over with always want hang out with friends, maybe like what Ive said before - everything thing has a transition period, and mine for that is over. These days I seem want to be at home, do not have any intention want to date with friends, weird right? A sociable girl anti-socialing.
My friends said Ive changed compare to years ago. They said nowadays, I seem not that active anymore, I am still a crazy while we talk, I mean in terms of socialising. They said I would like to stay in comfort zone, not going to explore more stuffs, meet new friends, I am just quiet.
Herrr do not know what else to say, my life nowadays just repeating, sometimes i feel i am so sick with it. I have lots of decision need to make, every decision I need to make just feel like scratching my hair. SIGH.
Okay la bye.
25 October 2014
just some non-sense update
HiHi, I am here again, with a good mood, luckily. I didn't expect that time flies for this week, so fast come to an end and I'm like I'VE DONE NOTHING MUCH REALLY. I didn't even notice how I spend most of my times this week.
Hey how ya guys doing? I feel like I really want to ask this questions to all of my old friends, it seems like we lost contact quite awhile, and I am getting used with it ( I am just doing the same thing - the things they always do, just tired of being the one I start the conservation first, the one and maybe only one realised how long we've not contacted each other and the one who started to find them first ) I cant blame them, cause when I realised they have became the part of "not really important' in my life, I hardly remember their exists, except some moments like now, the times I actually stop myself and throwback everything. And actually, this is the way how I start my paragraph. You know, I dont want talk about this, no more, I dont really care now.
I am here for what, let me think, I just feel like what to write some shit here, so sorry I am not going to share bit things about the thing you guys feel interest and curious, I just enjoy sharing when friends ask personally.
Id made a big choice, I let a guy friend follow me, it stops me tweet so much, I shouldn't blocked that guy who followed me few weeks ago. Whatever, I get in touch with things lesser, I can more concentrate on studies, ignore non-sense, focus on something/someone more important. This is my aim for now, it takes time, but I believe it doesnt take really long, cause its working.
Okay, stop here. See ya.
Hey how ya guys doing? I feel like I really want to ask this questions to all of my old friends, it seems like we lost contact quite awhile, and I am getting used with it ( I am just doing the same thing - the things they always do, just tired of being the one I start the conservation first, the one and maybe only one realised how long we've not contacted each other and the one who started to find them first ) I cant blame them, cause when I realised they have became the part of "not really important' in my life, I hardly remember their exists, except some moments like now, the times I actually stop myself and throwback everything. And actually, this is the way how I start my paragraph. You know, I dont want talk about this, no more, I dont really care now.
I am here for what, let me think, I just feel like what to write some shit here, so sorry I am not going to share bit things about the thing you guys feel interest and curious, I just enjoy sharing when friends ask personally.
Id made a big choice, I let a guy friend follow me, it stops me tweet so much, I shouldn't blocked that guy who followed me few weeks ago. Whatever, I get in touch with things lesser, I can more concentrate on studies, ignore non-sense, focus on something/someone more important. This is my aim for now, it takes time, but I believe it doesnt take really long, cause its working.
Okay, stop here. See ya.
18 October 2014
Little things about my dad
What makes me feel so good? Its just because today is weekend, and I had slept whole day ( to recharge myself, cause I only sleep few hours per day in weekdays ) And I feel so satisfied now. Between I keep make myself to appreciate and be thankful on every little thing. Like thank God I spend much time today with my dad, nowadays I can feel how much dad loves me. He made breakfast for me today ( well my mom is at oversea right now, these days my dad cooks breakfast and dinner for me, he just get so addicted, maybe is because I finish all the food he cooked ) Today morning was western breakfast, a simple one. When my mom we-chatted my dad while we were having breakfast, and asked where was I, my dad kind of showing off, told my mom he was having breakfast with me. Seriously, like usually, if my parents have each other to accompany, I will just go to library to study, cause I consider sleep quite a lot if I stay at home ( like today ), so my dad always feel quite happy able to grab meals with me. And in the evening, he bought me a roti pisang ( he knows I always craving about roti pisang, although I just had it yesterday with my friends outside ) And at night actually I dont feel like eating but I can feel my dad just wanted to go somewhere to have a good dinner, so I also just accompany him la ( and usually i will do that while my mom isn't here, cause daddy so kesian, having dinner alone, my two brothers just always not at home or else want daddy dabao, I'm such a good girl right ) Finally we decided to go to Chereas Sentral to see what we want to eat, and after that just spent time shopping with him ( we didn't buy anything though )
Although sometimes I think i hate wasting time to do something I dont like ( because time becomes so precious for me after i taking a level, it just ruins everything doesnt it ) but started I feel i should feel thankful and appreciates every chance that i able to spend with family. nowadays my dad feels his legs pain and refused to see doctor ( such a stubborn and old-fashioned man ) I can see my dad older and older, i dont know how much time i could spend with him, i dont know maybe myself will study oversea, i just dont know, so i should grab any chance that i could spend time with him. i hope he always in the pink of health.
wao typed a lot ady, should stop here la, back to study :)
12 October 2014
Surprisingly I'm back again
I am really not in the right mood now. Luckily Alex Turner's music album - Submarine has calmed me a little bit. I cant do any revision right now, kind of in pissed off mood, sigh. I don't feel like want to tweet, don't feel like want to post picture in insta cause I like the last pic stay at that place in my profile. I feel glad that I'm getting lesser to tweet nowadays ( but i still tweet non-sense la ) at least I didn't boom my insta with the event that I had already.
You know what? Rely is a sickness of lonely. And too care what people think of you also a symptom of afraid of being lonely. Nowadays I am trying to be enjoy the the time of being alone, you just don't care what people see about you, think about you ( most of the time people might not put any attention on you but you just feel it yourself cause you too care what people think about you, sometimes i think the way i dress bring attention too much ur huh, but i don't mind ppl look at me in a positive way )
Since I am in a bad mood, so I as a weirdo want to post something pretty that can make me happy. I just got back my laptop and all of the pictures taken in Bali. So Im going to post some!
You know what? Rely is a sickness of lonely. And too care what people think of you also a symptom of afraid of being lonely. Nowadays I am trying to be enjoy the the time of being alone, you just don't care what people see about you, think about you ( most of the time people might not put any attention on you but you just feel it yourself cause you too care what people think about you, sometimes i think the way i dress bring attention too much ur huh, but i don't mind ppl look at me in a positive way )
Since I am in a bad mood, so I as a weirdo want to post something pretty that can make me happy. I just got back my laptop and all of the pictures taken in Bali. So Im going to post some!
04 October 2014
Hi just to say Hello
It has been a long time that I didn't update my blog, my laptop just came back from repaired, costed me a lot, Apple such a branded brand, even repair price also branded. I am here for nothing actually, nothing specific thing want to post, remember how passion I was to update my blog but now I just lost it somewhere.
What makes me here? I want to tell that finally the only place I can express my thoughts was invaded - Twitter. I cant be making a new account again right, so just let it go la since Ive been thinking how to get rid from social media. I'm trying remove my addiction bit by bit.
Whats he actually thinking? Once he knew I have twitter account, he let me followed him, and of course I don't let him to follow me cause twitter is the place I hide for secrets, I only allow my bestie to follow me.
Just yesterday, he took my phone and then doing something secret again ( he likes taking my phone doing weird things ) I asked him:" What you want to do with my phone again" and I forgot what he said. I got back home and opened my twitter, and I saw a new notification, then I clicked and see - N is now following you. LOL WTH?! Fine. I cant be block him right? Since he wants it so desperately till wants to follow me without my permission. I want to see whats he going to do and I think I should use this chance to deactivate myself in social media, doesnt it?
Hmm, so far the progress is not bad, I still tweeting, but seems theres many restriction, I tweeted less. And instagram, I didn't post pictures for two events already. Doenst its a good start too? I still addicted with it, I always think I want to post something, but I try my best not to. Taadaa, I can do it! Lets doing something more meaningful la!
See what else I can do and what kind of excuses I can find! "determination mode" is on!
Heheh, post some latest photo of myself. ( These were taken in Bali )
What makes me here? I want to tell that finally the only place I can express my thoughts was invaded - Twitter. I cant be making a new account again right, so just let it go la since Ive been thinking how to get rid from social media. I'm trying remove my addiction bit by bit.
Whats he actually thinking? Once he knew I have twitter account, he let me followed him, and of course I don't let him to follow me cause twitter is the place I hide for secrets, I only allow my bestie to follow me.
Just yesterday, he took my phone and then doing something secret again ( he likes taking my phone doing weird things ) I asked him:" What you want to do with my phone again" and I forgot what he said. I got back home and opened my twitter, and I saw a new notification, then I clicked and see - N is now following you. LOL WTH?! Fine. I cant be block him right? Since he wants it so desperately till wants to follow me without my permission. I want to see whats he going to do and I think I should use this chance to deactivate myself in social media, doesnt it?
Hmm, so far the progress is not bad, I still tweeting, but seems theres many restriction, I tweeted less. And instagram, I didn't post pictures for two events already. Doenst its a good start too? I still addicted with it, I always think I want to post something, but I try my best not to. Taadaa, I can do it! Lets doing something more meaningful la!
See what else I can do and what kind of excuses I can find! "determination mode" is on!
16 September 2014
Complaint
Hi, I am here, I cant write 'again', how sad is that, doesnt it? I am not an active blogger anymore. Why I am here? I don't know. I just feel like typing. And I quite hate to see the old post over and over again when I open my website. I am so depress, don't know what to do, don't know what to choose, don't know what decision should or shouldn't I make. I always hate regret after I make my choices. I am such a dilemma person.
Ive been busy quite awhile. And I spend a lot of time on thinking, seriously I am thinking not daydreaming. I don't get anything or sign or decision after Ive been thinking for so long time. I just keep questioning myself, all over and over again, about the same thing.
Its like Ive been stuck for so long, after I chose A Level as my pre-U. I don't know, I don't have confident, I don't trust myself, I keep comfort myself that although I am not the really good one but I am a better person. A Level has just kept destroy every bit of my self-confident. I don't know am I really not smart enough for it or am I not work hard enough for it. If its the second option, is this the life I want? People say you cant get what you want if you are not work hard enough. But my question is if I work hard enough, I get the good result and choosing something that I think I should choose because of the result, is that what I really want? You can see Ive made so much effort on that, I couldn't imagine if I am going to choose more challenging course like medicine, how much hard work should I put to afford this more challenging course?
You know, I am so blur, I just keep complain and blame myself. Well, I have stuffs to do again, you know times always not enough for me, an A Level student.
Ive been busy quite awhile. And I spend a lot of time on thinking, seriously I am thinking not daydreaming. I don't get anything or sign or decision after Ive been thinking for so long time. I just keep questioning myself, all over and over again, about the same thing.
Its like Ive been stuck for so long, after I chose A Level as my pre-U. I don't know, I don't have confident, I don't trust myself, I keep comfort myself that although I am not the really good one but I am a better person. A Level has just kept destroy every bit of my self-confident. I don't know am I really not smart enough for it or am I not work hard enough for it. If its the second option, is this the life I want? People say you cant get what you want if you are not work hard enough. But my question is if I work hard enough, I get the good result and choosing something that I think I should choose because of the result, is that what I really want? You can see Ive made so much effort on that, I couldn't imagine if I am going to choose more challenging course like medicine, how much hard work should I put to afford this more challenging course?
You know, I am so blur, I just keep complain and blame myself. Well, I have stuffs to do again, you know times always not enough for me, an A Level student.
01 September 2014
Birthday Celebration ( Part 7 ) & Ming Li Birthday Celebration
Sorry have been keeping you waiting, you know the reason right but I am still so sorry.
Well well well...let's start our throwback!
Date: 19th June 2014
Venue: Leisure Mall ( again, lol )
Bestie: Ming Li ( piggy butt )
I know you wished to celebrate with me earlier but you just didn't want to rush, I think you made a right choice! I was so stress while having my exam, so luckily you booked me after my exam, I was so relieve and happy. As usual, the nearest and convenient place to go - Leisure Mall. I think although we hate going to Leisure Mall but cant deny that it is a place that full of memories of our secondary school life, and it proves our friendship going on and on.
Okay I am still glad that we can talk a lot every time we meet, we still know how's each other going on without chatting, thats the amazing part right? I like this relationship. I appreciate you concern me via your own way, read every my single tweet and post detail-ly. You're the best follower.
Well while I am typing this post, I stopped and went to read your letter for me in your blog. I remember I have some feedback for that letter and I reminded myself that I need to write it in this post.
"At times I used to compare my lifestyle with yours and wonder why you were so lucky while I was just so ordinary"
"... also have really good fashion sense. You can also keep your skin so nice and clean, know how to dress well..."
My comment: You know what? The pictures you put is totally non-related to the sentence, when I saw that picture I was like... covered my eyes. Your friends must think of your sense has something wrong. They might just think and imagine:" How this fellow gonna dress fashionably and her skin is nice meh?"
" I guess I can rather confidently say that in my circle of friends, you actually come in as my 3rd bestie after Meow and CK (sorry no offense, hope you understand!)"
My comment: I am totally understand and acceptable! I am so proud of to be your no 3! I hope it will never change!
Well both of us actually keep repeating the same old stories over and over again, so people say: we are going to miss our secondary school life! Well thats true, and thats our wonderful teenage life that memorable and unforgettable as well, part of best time in our life. You know, sometimes I just don't know what to write in the letter, cause every time it would turns out repetitive, and I'm bored of it, hahaha to be frank. But I will keep up the traditional.
Date: 8 Aug 2014
Venue: KL night tour
Bestie: Piggy Ming Li
The shortest duration we met again. It was just one and half months. It was my holidays again, woohoo so cheerful. I remember that day you were so excited and talkative, how long we'd jam in the road, how long you talked, luckily I am a pro-driver, can drive while talking. Either you feel thankful, I feel so thankful too as I really seldom enjoy night walk in KL. The only imperfection was that day was so crowded, I couldn't really walk steadily and enjoyed the wind blew into my face and you whispered beside me.
We enjoyed our dinner at Tous Les Jous, a place very romantic and England retro-style like Harry Potter. The only bad thing was we should enjoy our dessert there as well but both of us were so full and actually the desserts that day didn't look so attractive. After that you enjoyed your Starbucks which only can have once in a blue moon and I had nothing, my 3D art coffee shop was closed, so sad, tears streaming down my face.
I hope you like my present, which I think it suits you because 虽然你给人的感觉是大咧咧，可是在感情上你是丰富而又细腻的, and days before I saw you posted picture of clovers, so doesnt it a right present for you. And a box of chocolate, I hope that cheer you up or lighten your day as well!
I hope we will see each other pretty soon, and I hope our friendship can last forever and stay as close as we wish.
Well well well...let's start our throwback!
Date: 19th June 2014
Venue: Leisure Mall ( again, lol )
Bestie: Ming Li ( piggy butt )
I know you wished to celebrate with me earlier but you just didn't want to rush, I think you made a right choice! I was so stress while having my exam, so luckily you booked me after my exam, I was so relieve and happy. As usual, the nearest and convenient place to go - Leisure Mall. I think although we hate going to Leisure Mall but cant deny that it is a place that full of memories of our secondary school life, and it proves our friendship going on and on.
Okay I am still glad that we can talk a lot every time we meet, we still know how's each other going on without chatting, thats the amazing part right? I like this relationship. I appreciate you concern me via your own way, read every my single tweet and post detail-ly. You're the best follower.
Well while I am typing this post, I stopped and went to read your letter for me in your blog. I remember I have some feedback for that letter and I reminded myself that I need to write it in this post.
"At times I used to compare my lifestyle with yours and wonder why you were so lucky while I was just so ordinary"
My comment : Do not compare yourself with me, you're just the way you are! You're lucky as well as you're smart, you're not just smart but SO SMART. I have a smart friend who got her GPA 4.0! I have a smart friend who can speak fluent English! I have a friend who slimmer and taller than me! Well you think who should the one to envy?
"... also have really good fashion sense. You can also keep your skin so nice and clean, know how to dress well..."
My comment: You know what? The pictures you put is totally non-related to the sentence, when I saw that picture I was like... covered my eyes. Your friends must think of your sense has something wrong. They might just think and imagine:" How this fellow gonna dress fashionably and her skin is nice meh?"
" I guess I can rather confidently say that in my circle of friends, you actually come in as my 3rd bestie after Meow and CK (sorry no offense, hope you understand!)"
My comment: I am totally understand and acceptable! I am so proud of to be your no 3! I hope it will never change!
Well both of us actually keep repeating the same old stories over and over again, so people say: we are going to miss our secondary school life! Well thats true, and thats our wonderful teenage life that memorable and unforgettable as well, part of best time in our life. You know, sometimes I just don't know what to write in the letter, cause every time it would turns out repetitive, and I'm bored of it, hahaha to be frank. But I will keep up the traditional.
Date: 8 Aug 2014
Venue: KL night tour
Bestie: Piggy Ming Li
The shortest duration we met again. It was just one and half months. It was my holidays again, woohoo so cheerful. I remember that day you were so excited and talkative, how long we'd jam in the road, how long you talked, luckily I am a pro-driver, can drive while talking. Either you feel thankful, I feel so thankful too as I really seldom enjoy night walk in KL. The only imperfection was that day was so crowded, I couldn't really walk steadily and enjoyed the wind blew into my face and you whispered beside me.
We enjoyed our dinner at Tous Les Jous, a place very romantic and England retro-style like Harry Potter. The only bad thing was we should enjoy our dessert there as well but both of us were so full and actually the desserts that day didn't look so attractive. After that you enjoyed your Starbucks which only can have once in a blue moon and I had nothing, my 3D art coffee shop was closed, so sad, tears streaming down my face.
I hope you like my present, which I think it suits you because 虽然你给人的感觉是大咧咧，可是在感情上你是丰富而又细腻的, and days before I saw you posted picture of clovers, so doesnt it a right present for you. And a box of chocolate, I hope that cheer you up or lighten your day as well!
I hope we will see each other pretty soon, and I hope our friendship can last forever and stay as close as we wish.
To be continued - Birthday Celebration ( Part 7 &8 )
Nah I'm here again, same reason, when I need to start doing my homework, I always have the feeling to update my blog. Nowadays, blogging isn't my favourite thing to do anymore, I do not know why. Maybe I am just not enough time for that, you know, I prefer spending time on other stuffs to relax myself when I have that bit of time.
If follow the sequence, this post should be about my birthday celebration again, ya haven't come to an end. I think I just update pictures? I dont know when I would able to find the passion of writing blog again. Many things have changed, not only this. I don't want talk about this anymore, this only would depress me.
So let's see.
Date: 18 June 2014
Venue: Cheras Sentral
Bestie: Khai Yuet
I met her when we were both Form 3 and we were spending a year together. She is my only swimming partner. I love spending time swimming with her and after that we will both sit in the playground, stare at the sky and talk a lot. Time flies. I could remember back to few years ago my parents always sent she and I to the swimming pool and I got my license now, I fetch her every time we going to somewhere. We seldom meet after graduated, only few times per year. I wish I could see her more often, she is such a lovely and understanding girl.
If follow the sequence, this post should be about my birthday celebration again, ya haven't come to an end. I think I just update pictures? I dont know when I would able to find the passion of writing blog again. Many things have changed, not only this. I don't want talk about this anymore, this only would depress me.
So let's see.
Birthday Celebration ( Part 7 )
Venue: Cheras Sentral
Bestie: Khai Yuet
I met her when we were both Form 3 and we were spending a year together. She is my only swimming partner. I love spending time swimming with her and after that we will both sit in the playground, stare at the sky and talk a lot. Time flies. I could remember back to few years ago my parents always sent she and I to the swimming pool and I got my license now, I fetch her every time we going to somewhere. We seldom meet after graduated, only few times per year. I wish I could see her more often, she is such a lovely and understanding girl.
Birthday Celebration ( Part 8 )
Date: 19th June 2014 ( Part 1 )
Venue: My house -> TeaBoBo
Friends: Peipei, Lei Hui & Lai Kuan
I felt so bad that they celebrate my birthday every year but every time when come to their birthday, the plan always failed. Although we don't have lot to talk, but they are just such nice friends that... yea they are just kind and nice, they make you feel relax, like nothing to scare of and worry of.
After met with them, I have another date with my piggy MingLi. I got to spend more time on writing her one as she is the special one too. See ya next post!
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